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MTK The Writist

~ my blog and journal

MTK The Writist

Category Archives: NYC

Mingus Big Band

13 Friday Feb 1998

Posted by mtk in NYC, poetry

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1998, Band, Big, cafe, fez, Karthik, manhattan, mbb, Mingus, mtk, time

 

Yo, I was set up …  by Mingus

and knocked down  … by The Mingus Big Band

over gin and tonics at the Fez

First Visit to the Metropolitan Opera, 1998

10 Tuesday Feb 1998

Posted by mtk in journal entries, NYC, reviews

≈ 1 Comment

2/10/98ce
–55 West 13th Street, Manhattan, New York, noon

It’s a Tuesday morning and last night I saw the inside of the Metropolitan Opera House at Lincoln Center for the first time in my life. I saw the Met production of Die Zauberflote by Mozart.

Lincoln Center is really beautiful.  The main entranceway holds a grand staircase placed between two very large canvasses by Marc Chagall, bright colors and swirled lines.  The interior of the Opera House is all golds and red velvet.  I did a sketch at intermission of the stage lay out.  Our seats were pretty far back and high up but the view was perfect.  The performers are un-mic’ed and yet their voices and the music carry so beautifully through the hall.  The place is intimate despite its size.  It has five rows of box seats up the left and right sides of the stage.  Everything is covered in red velvet.

The seats are equipped with Met Titles which appear on a small digitized computer screen placed in a railing before each seat.  the titles provide simultaneous translation of the Opera.  They can be turned on and off and will pick up at any given line as the production proceeds.  Gracefully designed devices.  You cannot “read” the screens on either side of you because of the angle of placement, however if you lean forward you can see in the dark theatre the seat by seat staggered glow of gold letters on screens before the seats below you. Marvelous technology which makes the production much more enjoyable for audience-members who do not speak German or Italian or etc.

“Die Zauberflote” means “The Magic Flute.”  Ignoring the racist positioning of the White European in a position of superiority over the Moor and the general glorification of white over black features, light over dark which is established in the piece, the opera is a light-hearted romance about love and human longing for companionship.  Papageno the clown and his Papagena provide the comic climax in the pa-pa-pa-pa scene which I saw first in the film “Amadeus.”  There are high arpeggiated sequences by the Queen of Night who handled them with flair, and long tender arias by both Pamina and Tamino, the leads.  There are also noble arias by the baritone who plays the King, Sarasanto.  There are even roles for three young boys who play guiding angels to the hero, Tamino.

The racism in the opera isn’t about current ideas of race hatred, it is simply the ignorance and attitudes of an era gone by – lyrics by Papageno glorifying the beauty of the white, blonde-haired Pamina and several about the ugliness of the Black Moor.  It is frustrating that such lines will exist in the context of a Meisterwork by a man like Mozart for so long.  Frustrating to me at least whose face is brown and more like the black-faced white man who portrayed the Moor, than the blonde-blue eyed woman who played the princess.

The experience was a good first one for me at the Lincoln Center and with the Metropolitan Opera.  The tickets were expensive ($66) and we were treated to them and to dinner – at the Italian restaurant Fiorello, just opposite the theatre on Broadway – by Alex and Sally, a lovely elderly couple who are friends of R. who works in my office.  It was a good time.  But I find socializing difficult.  I had the seared tuna in capers, onions, roasted peppers and sundried tomate.  (boring though it sounds nice … It was tasty but predictable).

Quickly now to last Wednesday to cover the lecture entitled “Lawyers of Political Prisoners in the United States,” at the Benjamin Cardozo Law School and pulled together by Michael Kasner and BALLSA (maybe it’s black and latin-american law students association??).   A panel discussion hosted by Kathleen Cleaver and featuring Johnnie Cochran, Lennox Hinds, Leonard Weinglass and others.  A powerfully inspiring lecture by a group of lawyers who care about people.  It was meaningful on many levels.

Got straight dope on the cases of Assata Shakur, Mumia Abu Jamal, Dr. Mutulu Shakur, geronimo ji Jaga and others.  Some heavy statistics:  there are now 600,000 lawyers in the US.  Of these 90% work for 10% of the wealth.  “That leaves 10% for the rest of us.”  Maybe 600 work in areas like political prisoners rights and etc.  Stats about Mumia’s case that are still overwhelmingly frustrating to accept.

A letter from Assata Shakur to “his Holiness,” Pope John Paul II on his visit to Cuba in response to a request of the Pope by the New Jersey State Police to help them extradite Assata Shakur  Too much.  Lennox Hinds was fantastic.  He spoke so eloquently of ethics.  It was truly inspiring and the lecture was packed with people.

I need a haircut, gotta take a

<Break>

Karmic Rubber Band

09 Monday Feb 1998

Posted by mtk in conceptual art, essay, journal entries, NYC

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1998, Band, brent, brooklyn, club, dbk, greenpoint, karmic, kirkpatrick, m.t. karthik, manhattan, mtk, rubber, St. Mark's Bar, stories, the bottom line

2/9/98ce
— 55 West 13th Street, Manhattan, New York, noon

Today is a Monday in February and the sun is shining in New York through clear skies.  It is cool but not cold and the blue in the sky is high and whitened by a thin wintriness. These events are from last week:

Karmic Rubber Band

B., my neighbor down the hall is a recent arrival in New York City from Austin, Texas where he has been for the last 6 years.  Prior to that he lived in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.  Now he’s 27 and lives in our warehouse building in Greenpoint, Brooklyn and works in Manhattan at a retail bookstore (a national chain) and at The Bottom Line club.  Last week, he had friends in town visiting from Baton Rouge.

MT., 27, and JO., 22, punks traveling from Baton Rouge to New York and back in a little, two-door, Honda CRX within which they were also sleeping, were staying alive by eating peanut butter sandwiches and MRE’s – Meals Ready to Eat, military rations purchased by MT.’s father, a soldier – while on the road.  They were young scrappers who had taken to living in condemned buildings in Baton Rouge to keep from having to get too many jobs.  They had been on the road for a month or so.

I met them briefly the night before last Monday morning when I ran into them in the hallway outside B.’s door.  I asked them that morning what they were up to.  They were building a frame for B.’s bedroom wall.  I offered them some marijuana to help them stay focused and get through the task.  They accepted, so I left them with a small amount of weed and my pipe and lighter and headed off to work.

I got into work and had a message from my friend M. who was taking the day off from work and planned to be downtown near my office.  We made plans to meet for lunch.  By 3:00, I hadn’t heard from M. so I decided to get some lunch for myself before my 4:00 meeting with the Vice President and several members of the Accounting department.  I walked out of my office, though, and saw M. just walking towards me in the street.  He had just gotten to the building.  It was the first coincidence of the day.  I took M. around the corner to Bar 6 on Avenue of the Americas for lunch.

Afterward we made plans to meet in the evening and I went back to work while he strolled off to the East Village.  At 4:00, I went with C., the manager of the department in which I work, to the meeting with Accounting.  It went all right and when I returned it was already 5:30.  M. was waiting outside my office building for me.  I brought him up to check out where I work and then we went walking.

We ended up at St. Mark’s Bar in the East Village, enjoying high-flying alto solos by Bird over quartets and quintets of swinging rhythms and over our heads as we sipped a couple of cold beers and talked about music and art.  I went to the bathroom.  While I was in there, M. got the high sign from a fellow at the bar.  When I joined them, we all went outside to have a smoke.  Out on the sidewalk we made a smoker’s circle. M. and I introduced ourselves to our host, R. who produced a fat little joint to pass.

R. is a light-skinned brother with a thin, evenly-groomed mustache.  He has short, carefully styled hair and full lips that part to reveal a glowing set of teeth when he smiles.  We all laughed and chatted as we passed the smoke, talking about all manner of things.  Somehow the conversation came around to my space in Brooklyn.  I mentioned that I was living in an unfinished warehouse space, that I was working on it to build a live/work studio.  R., suddenly looked at me strangely as he pulled on the joint that had just been passed back to him by M.  After exhaling, he asked if I was living in Greenpoint.  I was surprised that he guessed.  All I had said was that my place was in Brooklyn.

He was holding the joint, now-half smoked.  He smiled and said, “Do you know a guy named B.?  It was incredible:  8 million people in New York and we get pulled out by a guy who knows my neighbor.  He was a co-worker of B.’s at the The Bottom Line.  We couldn’t believe the coincidence.  I laughed and said, “It’s even more perfect because just this morning I gave his friends a little bag to get them through the day.”  We looked at each other and for just half a second locked eyes and then collectively looked down at the joint.  I looked down at it, thinly burning with ashy flecks across it’s orangey tip in R.’s hand. “That’s my weed!”  I half-shouted.  We broke up the circle and fell away into individual peals of laughter, three high-flying brothers smoking a j. on the sidewalk in the Village and cracking up

The coaccidence was dazzling.  Over in Brooklyn in the morning, I give away a small bag of weed to my neighbor’s friends and not ten hours later in Manhattan, a co-worker of his, unknowingly and independently gives my friend the high sign and ends up sharing a joint with me.

A couple of nights later, on the eve of their departure to Baton Rouge, I took MT. and JO. to dinner.  I figured the two young punks would need a little better food than MRE’s to sustain them on the long journey back to the deep South.   B. came along with.  We went to the little Thai place in Greenpoint a few blocks from our place.  When I told him the story of meeting his friend R., I ended by saying, “Hey man, I know I can trust you as my neighbor.  I mean I lent you something and I got it back within less than a day, a borough away … I mean your shit is tight … you’re like a karmic rubber band.”  And we all laughed and had a good time.

After we smoked the joint down, we went back in the bar to finish our beers.  Then M. and I made our way out to my place.  We hung out, smoked some more pot as I cleaned up and we made plans to go to St. Nick’s Pub.  My hot water still wasn’t working then and I was really funky, so I asked M. if I could stay out at his house that night and he readily invited me to do so.  I grabbed up some clothes, threw them into my work bag and M. and I were off to Harlem.

BROTHER CAME FLYING OUT THE SUBWAY DOOR …

… BALD HEAD shining, hollering, “Milky Way, Man, Milky Way!” paid the guy, got the candy and got back on the train before the doors closed.   And we made our way on to 145th street.  That’s what I wrote down on the back of a business card on the way up to M.’s.  with brother unwrapping that thing all casual-like and munching on it as we rolled along.  I’ll tell you the things I’ve seen on the New York City Subway one day.

We went up to M.’s place on 145th around the corner from St. Nick’s so he too could change clothes.  He had a message on his machine from a woman he had met the week before who reported she would be at St. Nick’s that night.  Earlier, after I had given the young punks the weed and come into the office, and before lunch with M. and my series of coincidences and coaccidents, I had written myself a short journal entry:

I have been having crazy nights.

… Just Long Enough

St. Nick’s Pub has an open mic jam session on Monday nights hosted by MC Murph and produced and promoted by Berta Indeed Productions.  It features Patience Higgins and his quartet, who host some of the baddest local talent cutting one another in solotime and occasional newcomers and amateurs as well.

When we arrived things were sounding a little cheesy but they straightened up a bit and before long we were sitting and finding grooves as various soloists made their way through Parker charts and other standards.  We weren’t there twenty minutes when M.’s friend arrived with her two girlfriends T. and J. – three chocolate-colored, gorgeous women who turned every head in the house at one time or another.

M.’s friend is beautiful.  She is thin and curvy, about 5’6” tall in heels and she has a bright smile that she shares when inspired to do so.   She is a poet and spoken-word artist who performs regularly in the New York area.  Her friends are equally beautiful but uniquely so.  T. had long cornrows and a round, gentle face.  J. was an Amazon.  Well over 6 feet in heels, she was tall and lanky and moved with a gangly beauty that gave her ebony arms a mystical quality.

J. was kinetic.  Her arms moved smoothly and hypnotically, yet quickly and out of her own control.  We all sat together, listened to the music and talked.  J. and T. stood up often and danced, with one another and alone, bringing a desire to the hearts of everyone present and filling the room with the magic of music’s power to move a body and soul.  They were sexy and nimble and moving sensually, energized by the swelling music that filled the little joint.

T. even arranged with MC Murph to sit in.  She wanted to sing. It was her first time singing at St. Nick’s.  She did “On Green Dolphin Street,” and after a little timidness in the first go around came back after the solos to finish strong and clear with only a slight, wavering tremolo to reveal what may have been any nerves on edge.  She sang clearly and held her body still to the microphone staring evenly into the audience, smiling at her friends occasionally.  We all enjoyed ourselves.

I am new to this place, to these people.  I’ve learned it’s foolish to try anything too soon.  So I was keeping quiet.  Listening to the music and relaxing.  I ached to let these three women know how much I admired their shapes and styles, but knew how stupid I would sound saying so.  But it’s good, I think, to let people know you notice their beauty even if time and space conspire against doing anything about it in the now.  If you have an opportunity, you’ve got to seize it.

J. was talking with us all at the table when she managed in the whirling motion of her long, beautiful arms, to knock over her drink.  She pulled her chair back from the table, startled, as we picked up her drink and patted at the table with napkins, telling her not to worry about it.  “Oh, God, my arms are just too long,” she apologized as she scooted back from the table, “I’ll just move back here.”

Quickly and for perhaps the first time all evening I spoke up, “No baby, your arms are … just … long enough,” I said, looking directly into her eyes, “come back over here and we’ll just move your drink.”  I ordered another round for her and the other women and we were all too smooth for words.

M. and I strolled in the cold, back to his place.  On the way I teased him about his friend.  He kept saying, “She’s not my girlfriend!” and when he did I heard the desire behind it.  We both knew how nice it would be if she were.  Before going to bed, we listened to both sides of the Abbey Lincoln album he had bought earlier that day down in the Village.  Her voice rang rich and sweet through the Harlem night as I drifted off to sleep on M.’s comfy old couch.

And that’s the story of last Monday.

<Break>

Tuesday I woke up at M.’s house with a bit of a headache from the gins-and-tonics the night before.  Predominantly from the gins, I’m sure.  I decided to skip work so I called in sick and stayed in the city.  I caught the D down to 59th street and then went walking over to the Upper East Side.  I had lunch by myself at a little French bistro – ordered a seared Tuna – and bought a couple of back pocket journal/sketchbooks.  Then I strolled over to Gracious Home on 72nd and Third and picked up some paint brushes.  I went home and slept.  That night I was in, listening to Mingus and watching ships pass the Manhattan skyline as the lights went on in the City.

Wednesday I got up and went to work to try to achieve something, anything.  It was good.  I managed to make.  There was the lecture … gotta get that lecture covered.  It has too much to handle poorly.

Thursday I took off from work again, rainy and cold weather and the hot water finally on.  I hung out with the visiting kids from Baton Rouge, made a dope deal (scored a $50 quarter bag of some weak-ass shit) and built a shower curtain set up (a “d” rod with a hanging cord to a metal ring in the ceiling of the bathroom).  I took the Lousiana punks for their going away dinner that night.  Had a hot shower for the first time in my space on Friday morning.

Friday was D. and being out and acting silly – drinks at Bar 6, dinner at L’Orange Bleue (430 Broome Street), drinks at bar ñ and then on to Soho.  A late night walk through the East Village and ending up at a little cheesy brazilian bar called Anyway with a guitar duo who couldn’t keep time but could finger-pick like a couple of Brazilian freaks.  We laughed and acted silly and misbehaved and were just happy together which we hadn’t been in months.

Then the weekend has been an explosion of food and drink and joyous celebrations of a million senses.  My fortune cookies and horoscopes are all overwhelmingly positive and my mind is confused about what I am supposed to be doing.  I keep going with the flow.

My new roommates have a 1971 Ford Gran Torino of a metallic green color with a white hard top.  It is a beautiful old machine.  I now have keys to that machine and on Sunday we loaded up into that low-riding cruiser, crossed the Queensboro Bridge and came into the city.  We went to Pongal, the South Indian place in the twenties and then to this really cool sake bar downstairs on 9th street at 2nd in the East Village, it’s called Decibel.

Cruising on a Sunday afternoon.  In the green machine.
New York:  Manhattan.  Brooklyn.  Queens.

mtk 1998

snow my first night in Brooklyn, 1998

21 Wednesday Jan 1998

Posted by mtk in NYC, poetry

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Tags

1998, brooklyn, Karthik, m.t., mtk, ny, poem, snow

I’m shivering –
can’t hold myself tightly enough and there’s no one else to hold me.
It’s cold.
It snowed last night on the spring equinox.
It only snowed once in New York this past winter –

that day, three full moons back, when I returned from Boston
to spend my first night in Brooklyn.

It fell in drifting, tiny, crisp, wispy flakes
that melted when they struck the concrete
and the earth of the city
mean

while it was snowing
in drifts up and down the east coast
shutting down whole swaths of automated New England
killing electricity for thousands
killing several who were inadequately housed.

My first night in Brooklyn was cold.
I fashioned a bed from a piece of sheetrock laid across cement cinderblocks,
and covered it in some of my warmest clothes.
My overcoat was a blanket.

I lit some candles.

there was no heat, no bath, and no electricity.
there was a toilet and a sink that gave no warm water
and I watched it snow and considered the english language

There is no snow where I am from.

Never.

There, it is either wet or dry and usually it is too hot to be outside for long.

Now, I have traveled far from where I am from
and have seen many things and kinds of things.
I have, along the way, learned new words.

I have heard english-speaking people say, in amazement:
“the Inuit have more than 30 words for snow.”

and that day in Brooklyn I wondered how
english could have snow for millennia
and yet have only one word
for the many different kinds of falling white
I’ve seen –

the cold, browzy, white haze at great heights
the soft, gentle quiet of an empty field
tiny flakes and slippery ice
hard rains of sleeting shards.

english has been arrogant.

It just feathered that day.

It was just a little feathering down.

a feathering of

The End of 1997, New York

29 Monday Dec 1997

Posted by mtk in journal entries, NYC

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12/29/97ce
— 55 West 13th Street, Manhattan. New York, late morning

On the eve of the birth of the Christian’s Messiah I left the office for a late lunch and went to a bar around the corner, had a portabello mushroom sandwich and two glasses of champagne and then returned to work.  There were very few people left in the office.  The new employees like myself were straggling about – trying to get a handle on our tasks, seeking definition for our selves in the context of this place.

I sat and talked with a couple of my colleagues about the evening.  I intended a long walk through the city “to watch the Christians on their eve.  It is something I have done in cities all over the world,” I told them, and now I would get to do it in New York.

Together we mapped out a route for me.  It began from the office here in the central village and proceeded south and west and then cut across the island through Soho, back to the East Village and then up through Astor and St. Mark’s Places and eventually to Union Square.  I was to go up Park Place to 35th street where I was to cut over to Fifth Avenue and make my way up past all the shops and stores, past Rockefeller Center, to the park and my final destination, Wollman Rink at Central Park for ice skating.  The walk was to take several hours and would take me past some of the cities most famous landmarks.

We talked at length and then the very pretty young woman who works near to me in the office – and who is also new – and I began talking about the approaching holiday.  We would have a few days off, we were both new to the area, what would be doing & etc.  Her name is R., originally from Connecticut, she was returning there this evening after work to be with family for the holidays.  She was taking a 6:30 train.

I invited her to leave work a little early to have a glass of wine before her trip.  She agreed and we found ourselves at the little bar around the corner where I had just dined, she sipped a red wine and I another champagne.  It was nice.  I haven’t worked in an office in three years and I have forgotten about things like protocol.  I do not know even the most rudimentary rules for relationships in the office anymore.  I find them troublesome and I am fearful of them.  I was nervous thus to ask the young lady to have a drink, even though I wasn’t suggesting anything by it, but a drink.

She and I talked about art and philosophy and about her plans for courses at the New School.  It was a very pleasant time and then it was time for her to leave for her train.  I sat and finished my champagne alone.

A woman came in and sat beside me.  She chatted freely with the bartender and the waitress.  She was either a regular or was close with the bartender in some other context.  She had a slight accent.  She was Belgian.  The waitress, a half-Cuban, half-Puerto Rican, now american, commented in a slightly Nu-Yorican accent that the Belgian had not lost her accent despite having been here for so long.

The Belgian said she had not changed her voice in twenty years.  I asked them both if they ever changed the way they speak when they talk to different people.  They both appeared confused by my question and the Belgian shook her head negatively as she exhaled smoke and ashed her cigaret.  I continued, “Sometimes when I am talking to my family or to other Indians, even though I am speaking in English, my voice changes to the idiomatic English which they also speak.”

They both smiled at that in recognition and the waitress, the younger of the two commented that sometimes she did that when speaking to someone from another country even if it wasn’t her own country. The Belgian woman said she never changed her voice, but seemed to understand what we meant.

A woman came into the bar seeking a tobacconist and wanted to know where she could buy a brand of Cuban cigar called Romeo y Julieta. A man responded that the Romeo y Julieta company also grew tobacco off the island of Cuba.  The woman did not know this.  She wanted a cigar which would taste like the Cuban make of Romeo y Julieta cigars.  The man and I each recommended a brand of cigar and he knew of a shop.  She left.  Shortly thereafter I too left for my walk.

I had chosen the music to soundtrack my walk earlier in the day.  I was wearing a Sony Walkman and had Bach’s Suites for Solo Cello on tape as performed by Pablo Casals.  The Suite #1 began as I stepped onto 6th Avenue headed south and the sound of the long drawn bow across the strings filled my ears.

I walked southward on 6th.  The streets were crowded with people shopping.

<Break>

First Party in NYC, 1997

24 Wednesday Dec 1997

Posted by mtk in journal entries, NYC

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12/24/97ce
–55 West 13th Street, Manhattan, New York, late morning

Last Saturday night after cutting out early from the party Villedrouin took me to, I went with a couple of friends of his, Dwayne and Michael to see music at a club called St. Nick’s on St. Nicholas street in Harlem.  James Carter, a young alto-saxophonist showed un-announced, played a set and prompted me to holler, “Cat Can Blow!”

The party was a Holiday dinner get-together held by Villedrouin’s self-styled Gourmand Club – a revolving potluck dinner club – at a pretty big flat on Upper West Riverside with a penthouse view of New Jersey.  The beautiful people were bumping into some nice grooves.  There were young women moving in time, loveliness surrounded the basstones.  Downtempo and mid-tempo soul music.  Lots of chocolate-colored skin: African, Indian, Haitian and others. It felt good to be among like colors.

I couldn’t dance.  For me it wasn’t that kind of party.  I couldn’t find a groove.  But I had a nice enough time. I spent some of it talking with a young woman from Syria (via Kuwait) with whom I connected.  But I found myself preening and dancing like a peacock in my desire for companionship. I wanted a conversation … some intellectual stimulation.  This turn of fate drove me to spend time with this beautiful, tea-totaling, Muslim from Syria chatting about the writing process and the realization of the first dual, then multiple selves which are unrevealed in the context of cross-continental migration.

She was studying at the Teacher’s College near Columbia, had been here in New York for 8 months from the Middle East.  And we talked about the changes she had gone through.  “When I first came I was wearing all colors,” she said, “but now,” she pointed to her own shoes and pants, “I see I am wearing white and black and my overcoat is black and my shoes are black.”  We talked about how “everyone” in New York wears black.  We also talked about perceiving things in terms of Black and White with regard to the races.   When she first came to New York, she didn’t want to see the world as divided by race, but she found that after a short time she became race-conscious as a result of her time here.  She lamented this sensation.

She was not supposed to be at the dinner party, she should have been in Kuwait.  But as she put it there was some kind of political problem which didn’t allow her to return on her flight that morning.  “The country which sent me here to go to school, my country now won’t let me go home to see my family.”  She was hoping she would be leaving on Tuesday but still wasn’t sure.

I asked her what she would wear on the plane when she goes back.  She laughed and said she would wear black and white and a black coat.  I asked her who would be meeting her and where.  She told me and so I asked her to recall Kuwait International Airport in Kuwait City to her mind, to see her mother and father and her siblings there to pick her up.  I asked her about the weather there which she said would be pleasant at this time of year.  Then I asked her again what she would be wearing when her family first saw her, “I will take off my jacket on the plane,” she said smiling, “because I do not want them to see me all in black.”  When I asked her what clothes she would change into when she got home, I expected to hear the name of some kind of Muslim cloth or dress instead she looked at me with a big smile and said, “Red!  I will change into a red dress!”

I met a friend of hers named Sonal who was on her way to San Francisco the next morning and to whom I gave information regarding gigs she could check out.  I set her up by calling DJ Consuelo out in SF the next day and making sure she was on the guest list for the New Year’s Eve party at The Justice League.

Thanks to Villedrouin, I had been kindly afforded a share of a “blunt” that was going around in the hallway area when Michael passed by on his way toward his coat and hat.  Michael kindly explained to me that a blunt is a tobacco leaf wrapper wrapped around a fat collection of herb.  It was a stony treat which I shared with Chitra (one of the Gourmand club members) and the cat who rolled it whose name escapes me just now.  We were getting quite high when Michael announced he and Dwayne were going to see Jazz at St. Nick’s.

I felt out of place at the party.  I was dressed differently from the others and wore a West Coast posture, thought parties were about something different from what I sense the people here perceive them to be.  I see I am an amateur in the New York social scene.  I have few guides to it, but I know myself.  I hold my own with some small fear, though I have a lot to learn about the locals.

Michael, Dwayne and I left the party and headed up Broadway toward some friend’s place.  A word about Michael, a dark-skinned, very laid-back Arkansan who moved to New York a year-and-a-half ago to be a teacher. Michael’s got dreadlocks and the raggedy beard of a thinking man.  I like him.  He is solid.  A bass player who named his two cats after his two favorite bass players, Mingus and Percy.  Young.  Cool.  It was good to be in the company of somebody straight-ahead for a change.

Dwayne had a couple of friends who wanted to join us.  Bill, a Harvard student visiting New York on holiday, was staying with a couple on the Upper West side.  Notably, the young woman whom we briefly visited was a Rabbinical student at the Seminary in the Columbia University area.  She described this course as challenging.   She and her boyfriend were staying in that evening to watch the film “Big Night,”on a video which they had just begun, but their friend Bill, the Harvard student visitor was down to coming with us.

After picking up Bill, we had to meet still more friends of Dwayne’s which delayed us a little, Tomar, and her roommates, whose names I cannot remember, live a tad further uptown.  Michael and Dwayne argue as old friends, Michael expressing his displeasure at being led around to pick up all the people Dwayne needs to meet, and Dwayne defending himself.  Michael was to meet some people at Nick’s, whom he was concerned about delaying.  The two of them talk like a married couple, but are clearly friends who respect one another mutually.

We were in the process of deciding whether to walk, take buses, trains or cabs when we walked out of Tomar’s place.  There were too many of us to take one cab and we began that usual debate one hears in towns like New York or San Francisco or Paris about transportation.  Suddenly, just as I stepped out into the street, two yellow cabs, one directly following the other, pulled up.  It was remarkable – on a small side street in the upper upper west.  I raised my arms like an MC, held my hands out and stopped them both, feeling stony, high and just a little outrageous, I hollered, “Yo!  It’s too perfect!  Hop in!”  and we all got in.  We went to the club from there.

The club is long and narrow, with a low hung ceiling and a long well-lit bar.  The bartender, a pretty light-skinned woman with a gently rounded face and slightly slow and lazy-lovely features, had on a little red “santy-clause” hat.  The waitress was an older dark-skinned woman with a bright smile and a graceful manner.  The crowd was thin and the club mostly empty.

But the sound which filled the place was huge.

It was a quartet, a tenor, alto, keyboards and kit.  And then it was time for the kid to solo.  James Carter is the name, and let me only say, “CAT CAN BLOW!”

It was a good set and I was blown away by the sounds of that kid who played at me.  I appreciated that:  I was in Harlem, it was night and I was hearing a kid blow his horn.

Afterward, I went back to Michael’s place to check it out.  I have been trying to find a place to live and Michael had earlier told me the place he was living in was cheap and good living.  One of my motivations for checking out Harlem that night was to see what kind of a place it might be for me to live.  Dwayne is Michael’s upstairs neighbor.

Michael’s place was big, three rooms in a one-bedroom apartment and it was well-priced at $500 a month.  That’s the cheapest, clean, big place I have seen on the island of Manhattan.  We all sat around and had a few bowls and chatted about all sorts of things.

I left that night and went walking.  It was three-thirty in the morning in Harlem and I was walking to the A-Train.

Let me repeat.  It was three-thirty in the morning and I was walking alone on 145th street toward the A-train and it was a cold, clear and beautifully star-filled night a week before Christmas and I was in Harlem.

I stopped in the street and pulled my big, black overcoat tight around myself.  I stood for a moment, very high and smiling and stared at the night sky, at the few stars.  I felt some terrific joy then.  For a moment, I was resolved.  I remember being a child of 14, 15, 16 and reading about this world, about Harlem.  I remember putting the needle down on revolutionary vinyl by Coltrane, Bird, Monk, Ellington, Mingus.  And for a moment, that child, that 14-year-old was resolved.  Brought home.  I was an American.

*****

The next morning Michael’s father died and he flew back to Arkansas.

And now it’s Christmas Eve.  The last few days have been busy with apartment searching for me.  I was growing concerned about it and yesterday I “broke,” that is to say, I felt really worn down and run-ragged by the process and I let it affect my mood and attitude.  It was bad. New York is a powerful place.  It tugs at the mood and attitude.

Sunday I slept in and mellowed down.  It was a good day after a long night on the town.

I have been seeing places for a week now and I haven’t found anything I like.  I am fortunate I have the means to get a good place now that I have a good job.

<Break – to get lunch and a couple of glasses of champagne>

I am lucky to be able to do what I want when I want all over the world.  All is cool.

To return to a slower slower slower s l o w e r s l o w e r s lower … slow …..   deep breaths

<break>

the life oh the life …

In the last six months I have been in twenty five states of the US and untold millions of states of mind.  I am in new york now and the objective is to establish some kind of long-term mindedness.

LES Bars, nyc, 1997

19 Friday Dec 1997

Posted by mtk in journal entries, NYC

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12/19/97ce
–55 West 13th Street, Manhattan, New York, late morning

Yesterday I went down to the Village east theatre and saw Woody Allen’s latest offering.  It was a good time, though it is sad to see his scripts handled by the pathetic actors available to him these days, Demi Moore?  Kirstie Alley?  sad.  Some nice magical realism with film, but generally nothing too radical.  Still very linear but comedic.  I enjoyed very much the dirtyness, the roughness of the cut and the character.

After the film I went to a little bar across the way and had a manhattan (maker’s) and it was again not so tasty.  I think there is something wrong with the way they make manhattans here.  that must sound ridiculous but they don’t taste the same to me as the chilly, delicious up variety I had at Aqua or those delicious ones at Lulu in San Francisco.  Too bad.

After the drink I went down 2nd ave to meet Peter for a beer at the Mars Bar a small, cramped, dirty little leather and biker and beer joint.  Crass and real.  We had a beer and watched the people and talked.  Everyone at the Mars Bar knows Felix. – a mentally retarded, drunk half-wit who wanders around the little bar wailing and incomprehensibly pointing at people to do things in his own language from deep within his own mind.  It’s that kind of place.

The kind of place where the bartendress, a stringy-haired, middle-aged, white woman with tattoos and a friendly manner, says things like, “You shouda seen Felix when the Irish guys came in the other night.  He took care of all of ‘em.  When they went to the bathroom Felix ran up here and took each of their drinks and put them on top of their money and he watched over them.  He was really good to them Irish guys.”  She is sweet on the inside and daunting on the out.

And there was a young very high or drunk woman with thin, stringy brown hair which had been painted another color at some point, moving slowly from person to person commenting on her own general fatigue which plagued her so until she sat down and couldn’t find a comfortable seat, prompting a male customer to say in half-mocking derision, “it’s worse when you sit down, you’re better off standing.”  and she looked at him incredulously and swung around slowly saying, “what?  But I’m so tired!!” as if he just didn’t get it.

We finished our drinks and then went to see an apartment. I had made the appointment earlier and it was for a room to share in a two-bedroom place.  It was a crazy experience.  I mean here I show up – with Peter – and there are a handful of people there, too.  We are all desperately seeking a place to live and it’s weird weird weird.  The kids were young.   It was weird.

Peter and I went from there over to my office here because the Art Blakey Ensemble, directed by Peter Tolliver was having a performance.  We checked it out.  The students were ok.  The singer was quite lame lame lame.

After that it was off to the coffeeshop on Union Square for a few drinks and to chat about art with Peter.  It was good.  we had fun. Dropped a chunk of change on booze – had three martini’s.  But you know what, nothing tasted good.  Only the gin and tonic I had was nice to me. I think the city is a weird place.  I am not sure what they are putting in the drinks but it seems fishy to me.

I got home at 1:00 am because the goddam subway skipped stops from 96th to 137th for some repairs and we, all of us wait-ers, had to hang out at the 137th stop until the downtown-bound 1 train came back by to pick us up and take us the twelve blocks home … because nobody would walk from 137th to 125th at that hour, out of fear.  I crashed out almost immediately and had yet another hard time rising today.

I need my own place very badly.  At least my own room.

digital film festival at the kitchen before the 12th Annual Anti-Gentrification Festival, Harlem, 1997

20 Saturday Sep 1997

Posted by mtk in essay, journal entries, journalism, NYC

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95 Claremont Ave. #12, NY,NY, noon, 09/29/1997ce

The 12th annual Anti-Gentrification Festival will begin here in a minute.  There are tables being set up all through the intersection and the first crackly, then tinny, over-trebled and finally thuddy-bass-ed, and slightly more balanced sound of a PA of some kind kicks through the residential buildings at this corner.  The kids are all setting up different stands and tables outside as I write.

I want to do some straight chronicling of the events of yesterday because the day was so full of activity and information. Let me get my coffee and a little more comfortable for the direct reportage process.

<Break>  There is a relationship between B. and I as colleagues.  He is a writer of the daily.  He is a reporter.  He is a member of the press and he attempts to work within that structure.  I am a writer, too.  The type of writing I do is at a different tempo, set at wide, broad strokes over years.  Instead of the daily or the column-oriented construction of events into a format for a daily deadline, I create my own deadlines and parameters for describing and reporting on my world, at long-term estimation periods.

Yet we have so many things in common.  We take coffee and read the paper.  We are regular in our approach to the machine.  We keep orderly notations and structures.  Writers are a funny lot, but it is easy to pick one out when you’ve got one in your sights.  B. understands I’m a writer and so he provides a vantage point, coffee, the paper, simple things.  And a complex thing, too, for with the capacity to switch media like this I can capture much more than with just the field notes.

Here in the United States where so many things (everything?) are about money and its exchange, here in a capitalized society it is difficult to explain why I am able to use B.’s gear or coffee or he, mine.  In the world of the arts this question does not arise.  As an artist, we are communist by definition.  We have to commune in order to create in a meaningful way.  And so we try to order our efforts so the least amount of the fabric of the lives of others is required to allow us to participate to create the highest degree of impact or affect the highest degree of contact with others.

If a pen is the only thing I can afford, what is the most powerful thing I can make with it?  What is the most powerful thing I can say?  If I have access to a computer?  Or a video outfit?

The tools are merely media. One of the most stupid things to do is to glorify the tools themselves.

The issue of how to use them is the decision of the artist who takes his task seriously and approaches with an organized effort.  Right now I am in New York.  This aspect of the process requires me to be here, now and to wait.  So I’m trying to get what I can of the time.

I chronicle and report and keep the process going in whatever way possible.  I attempt to get to places and see things and try to document to the best of my abilities what I experience.  I am also trying to do something very different from journalists like Bob who participate in a language upon which his colleagues attempt to agree.

I am participating in a way in which I want to make language into a tool as well.  I want to bend and angle and break it if I have to in order to present what I feel is an accurate portrayal (in metaphor) of the me I was when I was experiencing the things I describe.

This includes an attempt to completely embrace subjective-ism.  It is to turn subject into object.  And collect with language.  This is the tempo of the kind of writing which I do.

For B., the writing itself and the perspectives represented take a back seat to the deadline and the result is the beauty of having a regular, ordered, ouevre of work over a long period of time (so beautiful) which requires, patience, discipline and dedication, not to mention the ability to tolerate editors, publishers and untold other interveners on a daily basis (no small thing – I CANNOT DO IT RIGHT NOW).  He embraces and accepts the natural limitations of the form.  I admire him his ability to do this, but I do not wish it for the world.

Well, let us begin shall we?

Yesterday morning I awoke to the beautiful sounds of South Indian music and singing as H., the Indian woman with whom I am staying, (who has been so kind and good to me since my arrival by accident in her lap in the street unknown, by “accident,” three weeks ago … see previous entries) awoke, showered and readied herself for her job to which she must go every morning at 8:30.

We chatted briefly about meeting up later in the day for a reading by two authors at a space downtown.  She had the directions at the office and so I told her I’d call her there later and she left.  I arose, drew a hot bath and took up a few of the fashion magazines which the woman from whom H. is subletting the apartment keeps on her windowsill.  It’s the first time I’d ever read any of these magazines which are such a huge part of the literature in this country.

There I was, 30, bearded, shaved head, in a hot bath, listening to music, reading Marie Clare, Harper’s Bazaar, and Vanity Fair.  The perspectives are on pop cultural issues and generally from a woman’s point of view, though not exclusively.  It was amusing to spend a morning on the upper-east side this way, despite being broke and unemployed. I am truly blessed and fortunate to have good friends and help with this process.

<Break>

So yesterday, I arose and read in the tub and sat about thinking for a while.  Went to the Scoop and Grind Cafe for a coffee and a bagel.  I have taken to the place.  I am able to sit outside and enjoy the people passing and have a tall hazelnut coffee with two shots of espresso and an “everything” bagel with cream cheese all for $3.50.

I spend the time reading the papers and so on.  Ted Turner, the billionaire entertainment and communications mogul has given the United Nations (the UN), one billion dollars.  The amount is the largest contribution of its kind anywhere, ever.  It’s absolutely phenomenal, and people seem to take it with hardly a thought.  It’s as if a billion has become meaningless.  But it isn’t.

The trouble is, what will the distribution of that billion dollars yield?  Political power for the unempowered worker in Bangladesh?  Ted Turner gives $1 billion to the UN and the next day a worker in India who is fifty times brighter than a worker in a McDonald’s in Biloxi, Mississippi, makes $3 a day in kind, not in cash and is able to eat a decent meal and feed his family.

Meanwhile the wages here in the US are spent on Tazmanian devil t-shirts and plastic toys.

Waste.  Consumption.  The false value of stupid objects designed by others to appear valuable but which are in fact cheap, and non-lasting.  Will Ted Turner’s money fix that?  It’s a problem which has gone on for fifty years untended and is, in some cases, worsening, more waste, more consumption.

New York is about money … I have heard people talk about how much they like making it, spending it, earning it, working for it, cheating others out of it, having it.  It is honestly at the heart of many of the discussions here.  It is the American, capitalized sensibility at its oldest and most evolved – New York, where people have come from every god-damn place and hacked out an existence. By using money.  By attributing value to money.

But what a life.  Is it a valuable life?  Or is it devoid of meaning?  (As one New York lifer told to me, “I cannot sleep where it is quiet, in the country, I have been around this noise all my life.  My fear is that … I don’t know if it is a good thing.  I don’t know if I don’t want it to be different.   I am afraid that it is unhealthy.”)

And another have actually said, “I live to make money.  I’m like a pit-bull when it comes to money.”  What meaning is there in the earning of money for its own sake?  Ted Turner gives away a billion and says it was like he gave away the earnings for the nine months of the year.  “I’m no worse off than last year,” he suggests.  It’s crazy.  The inequity of wealth in this society as a function of the value of money-  No. …  the subjective value of money.

If you choose to care about money, if you choose to value it and you work your ass off and you are lucky and you have certain advantages like a good family or connections, it STILL isn’t a guarantee you will have money, security or satisfaction or happiness.  It is something a person could spend a whole lifetime doing and have wasted a life.  True contentment comes from within.  Money is a manufactured construct, made to sate our desire for material happiness, security and contentment … but it requires enslavement.

Freedom is worth more than money.

Real freedom.  The freedom to be unencumbered by society’s groping need for your expenditure.  To participate as an individual for the collective good of the whole as you please, to reduce waste and participate.  Does Ted Turner do this?  His behavior night before last at the United Nations Awards dinner in his honor speaks to it.  His gift is an enormously powerful and important one.  Now to see if capitalists will learn from this the importance of supporting those in our society who do not accept money or capitalism.

The paper also reviewed the new exhibit at the Solomon Guggenheim Museums here in New York which opened to private reception night before last and was opened to the public yesterday.  The exhibit is an enormously encompassing retrospective of the works of Robert Rauschenberg, now 71 year-old artist who was born in Port Arthur, Texas in 1925 and moved to New York in 1949.

He was educated at the Black Mountain school in the late 40’s and early 50’s and this yields some thought about his cohort and his own work.  He was a student of Albers and participated with the encouragement of John Cage and Jasper Johns.  The influence of both is very much present in his work and self-referentialism of the era – in literature as well as arts and music – must be addressed.

It is at this time that Charles Olson and Robert Creeley began the correspondence of which so much has been written, collected, and discussed.  It has been posited that the Black Mountain School produced this movement of thought and idea which was named by its writers and energized by its artists and musicians.  In order for it to be valid a a movement, however, the artists and so on must produce at length with comparative relationships.  This seems to have happened.

The first use of the term “post-modern,” is attributed to the Creeley-Olson relationship.  Surrounded by such artists as Johns, Rauschenberg and Cage it is no wonder the naming took this path.  The Black Mountain School of thought can it be called?  How do we go past it?

The Guggenheim has taken an amazing step toward solidifying the reputation of this school of thought.

Mr. Rauschenberg’s stuff is everywhere, six floors of the main space uptown at 5th and 89th and also in the downtown gallery and at another site.  I have only seen three floors of the main hall’s dedication to R’s work.

fantastically broad usage of mixed-media and the incredible productivity of this fellow!  He made so much art between 1949, when he arrived in New York at the age of 24 to 1965, still in New York but with many many many overseas trips and attempts to his credit by 40 years of age.  16 years and an amazing amount of work.

It is an impressive and vast collection.  The use of mixed-media of such a wide variety (from gold leaf to photocopied images to photography to paints and drawings and blown glass and worked metal and text-and-image based stuff and lithographs and sculpture – taxidermified animals for God’s sake!) filled me with thoughts of Warhol, Johns, Cage and others a lot, but they were all contemporaries.

His use of the Mona Lisa as a photocopied image incorporated into another piece in 1952!  That impressed me as important with regard to image appropriation and manipulation.  It was so long ago.  Photography was in its middle years.  Rauschenberg was at least incredibly productive.  And he was innovative, and he had a wonderful sense of taste, especially for texture  (I’m using past tense and he’s not dead, but I haven’t really seen the stuff past 1971 or so … BTW, The De Kooning Retrospective in 1996-autumn was a much different type of show.  This thing can’t possibly travel this way, I think, but it will.  This is New York City.  Here you can do anything.)

The generation of artists who precede my arrival in New York with movements (before Arthur Danto’s  “Death of Art”) have huge institutions in their favor now.  But they didn’t when they were my age.  How can I make progress in this process now?  What is the key to understanding how to make a relationship with my community which allows me to create for a living?  Join the communities’ institutions?  Should I become a member of the Guggenheim?  Of the Met?  Of the monied?  Can’t. I’m broke.  All I do is write.  Hmmmmmmm.

After the Guggenheim (there are field notes in the New York Black Journal #1 – dated, 9/17/97ce) I walked down to H.’s place and had a couple of glasses of Yago (a cheap Sangria that’s tolerable when poured over ice) and sat down to roll three joints for the evening.  My joint-rolling skills are terrible, but here in New York, the common practice for pot-smoking is the joint and no paraphernalia. I have learned this from a number of sources – it is considered west-coasty and read wimpy to use pipes and bongs … joints are the NYC way … how funny to learn these things at 30 …

I got a call from D. who wanted to get together for a drink.  Kate is in town and I have blown her off pretty hard by not participating for the sake of my own vulnerability and so on.  D. had arranged for us to meet her late tonight at an event.

D. and I agreed to meet at the sushi/bar at the corner of my block and so I finished rolling three joints, smoked half of one, and made my way down to the corner.  D. was late and so I sat at the bar and had some sushi and a gin and tonic and wrote for a while (Field Notes Available – not important, some notes, “New York City:  It’s a distrac- … (beat) … It’s god-damned all a big-ass distraction.”  and others)

<Break> For a phone call from S. <Break>

That said let me return to last night …

After sushi, D. and I caught the 6 to the Drawing Center for the readings to be held there.  The Drawing Center is at 35 Wooster Avenue and houses a gallery space (I had heard of it before because, Glenn Seator, whom I met through Sebastian, who constructed his piece at the Capp Street Gallery in San Francisco, has shown his work at the Drawing Center – Seator was in the last Whitney Biennial).  The space is long and rectangular and well lit.  It has good, large windows in the front of the shop, and a nice-sized space within which to show.

The readings were by Anita Desai, someone else, and Amitav Ghosh.  D. and I arrived late and so we missed Desai and came in the middle of the second reader whose name I didn’t get and caught all of Amitav Ghosh who read from his new novel, “The Calcutta Chromosome,” reviewed positively by the New York Times as a complex, spiritual thriller-detective-type thing (NYTBR, two weeks ago when I first arrived).

The second-reader had a younger, faster-paced, style with pops and whistles.  He had all the elements of Indo-Anglian writers of the day, exotic settings (to english ears) and rhythmic approaches to the blending of languages and so on.  I wasn’t able to follow his reading so well, it lulled me because he had such little variation in his tone of voice as he read.  He was listless.  The audience, was polite and laughed when led to laughter.  I think oral presentations are supposed to be different experiences from reading the book itself.  I mean, here they are in front of a group and all.

They feel as if they are written to fit into a pre-defined structure ordained by the industry for Indo-Anglian writers.  I know that’s terrible to say, especially about my contemporaries, but what are we building that’s original?  I ask knowing the answer … little and everything.  We are original.  We are the new Indians.  We can’t help but be contemporary and original.  It’s never happened before, this thing.

Amitav Ghosh read from his novel which was available at the front of the gallery, beautiful jacket, case-bound, lovely job, by Avon Books … I was able to follow along in the text as he read which was a great benefit to the experience.

His work is slower-paced and more even.  It is much more traditional.  I mean in style, but not in content.  In content he has woven and toyed with ideas.  But the style is long and drawn and traditional.  I think his use of adjectives and adjectival phrases (much like the younger fellow before him) relies too much on Indian-ness … but perhaps this is because I am an Indian … (am I?  Only there, then … where?  when?)

Marvelously developed thoughts, though, and ideas.

H. and her brother and others went for food afterward and D. and I went on to the D-film festival at the Kitchen (by cab).

The Kitchen is a performance art space on 19th at 10th streets … past chelsea in the middle of noplace.  It was cool.  I mean a good, black, dark-ass space with lighting available.  But not so many people were there.  Still what a weird event, to see K. in NYC and to be at a film festival from SF touring the US and here in NYC first.

Most of the high-tech digital filmmaking is SF, LA, California … this year’s festival had several New York entrants and two of the guys were present.  It was good to see.  Content was limited.  I mean most of it was cutes-y and damn near vaudevillian.  But there were one or two which took interestng approaches.  There was one called, “Amend,” no plot, all image and spyrographic crazy beautiful trip through music … lovely and well-done.

Others of interest … but lots of cartoony-type stuff … what’s the point?  That isn’t content … one guy did Dreamboy and it was because as he put it, “I saw the South Park stuff and figured I could do that … so I did …”… it’s good, it’s funny, its impressive, but it’s got obscene jokes and silly content … mass-market … cool, whatever … you know?

There was 120 minutes of shorts and then a last extra … it was long and the chairs were hard and uncomfortable and all … but I mean it was cool to see the “cutting edge,” of computer-based technology utilized by its makers.  Give me content anyday though!!!!  Not even necessarily linear.

So afterward we went to a bar, had a drink, K. and I smoked out before and after the gig and in the street and wherever we pleased.

After D-film we went to Mark Summer’s place and saw a few of his films and saw K. in one … it was good to do.  Afterward D. and I had food and caught the 1 to his place.  I got here at 4:00 a.m.

Now it’s Saturday and the Anti-Gentrification fest is rolling loud outside D.’s place!!!

Gotta go.  That wraps up my description of my yesterday … 8:30 a.m. to 4:11 a.m. … damn near 20 hours on my third weekend in New York.

NYC crickets, Queens, North Front Street, 1997

29 Friday Aug 1997

Posted by mtk in audio, conceptual art, NYC

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recorded these crickets at the end of summer, August 29th, upon my arrival to New York City.

Letter to the Editor of the New Yorker, 1997

10 Sunday Aug 1997

Posted by mtk in essay, NYC, public letters

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1997, City, editor, Karthik, letter, m.t. karthik, mtk, new, york, Yorker

The idea called India today affects the lives of hundreds of millions of people.  This idea is embodied by a geographic area which has ever-changing borders in the minds of those who name(d) it.  We who were born on Indian soil know it.  Those who were not but who are related to India in some way feel a very powerful relationship between themselves and India.

Those born at this moment, in these hours, weeks and months fall into a different category.  They are the contemporaries of nations and countries named.

They will come to call places India, Israel, Ecuador, Panama, America, Europe & etc. There is lessening influence from the time when they were not named as such.  As the years pass those who called other names, or fought for other names or fought naming, grow older and eventually die.

When a person who thinks carefully about names has a child, it is a moment of great importance.  For many, naming a child is an important act, but for many others naming does not stop there.  The act of teaching names to a child is equally important.  Because the names one teaches may live for at least another  generation through this act.

Early in his essay, “Damme, This is the Oriental Scene for You!” (New Yorker, June 23 & 30, 1997, p.52) Salman Rushdie makes use of a newborn name: Indo-Anglian literature.  And in so doing teaches the many children of his revolution a new name.  Whether this name lives for another literary generation depends upon its use and its use, as with all language, is a function of its necessity. Indo-Anglian literature is, by the parameters of its creation, a contemporary art.  Contemporary arts throughout history are marked with factors that distinguish them from previous movements. Among these factors perhaps the most impressive is risk.  In contemporary arts risk may become more valuable than endurance.

History is dying.

The era of the written word as a valuable and trustworthy guide to understanding is yielding itself to other processes by which we come to estimate the world around us.  The diversity of the tools and media we have available to estimate and distribute estimations of events and acts around the world are affecting literature in unprecedented ways.  The historical word, first spoken, then written and now reduced to an accompaniment to images in both written and oral forms, is dying.

In its place a concert of word and image and sound and space and portrayal and metaphor are being utilized to represent truth.  The modern citizen of the physical world must deal with this as the ideological world shrinks to the size of a p-nut in the palm of an Indian boy running the aisle of a plane travelling a tres grande vitesse on 16mm film, 24 frames per second.

The greatest contemporary artists in the written history of the arts have been brave.  In the face of change and alteration of beliefs, they have sought methods by which they can represent truths.  These artists exist today.  They seek trust.  They try to represent hope.  They are as Gandhiji, conducting “My Experiments with the Truth.”  In this way we are living in a very complex time for an artist or writer who wishes to participate at the most important, the most global, the most contemporary level.

Indo-Anglian writing and arts share, with the arts of other ancient cultures (Afro-Anglian?  Chino-Anglian?  Sino-Anglian?) the new joy of working in the Post-Colonial Era.  Indeed, the joy of supporting the end of the colonial era in an effort to support the whole one-ness of the human species.  At his wonderfully unifying musical concerts, the great Fela Anikulapo Kuti used to say, “You can say many things with English, but in order to say many other things which are true you must break it, which is why we speak broken English.  This next song is in broken English. You must break your English to understand it.”

In this country, we are faced with a unique set of problems as artists and writers trying to represent truth with the tools available to us.  We are subject to the philosophies of the dominant culture in the United States of America, which paradoxically represent the Colonial Attitude in a different aspect.

To be an Indo-Anglian writer in the United States is to choose to be a contemporary artist working in a contemporary arena to represent truths which affect millions of people using the tools available in the most powerful country in the world, an awesome task.

The writers who represent post-colonial Indian thought in literature in English are dedicated to many similar topics, but writers who are Indo-Anglian face the same difficulties with naming as anyone who wishes to express: we do not want to be grouped.  And yet we are all tied to this land mass which, as an island something like 45 million years ago smashed its way into the continental spread of Asia forcing up the formation of the tallest mountain in the world and the twisted masses of mountainous geography in the North of India.  Such a violent, willful act of inclusion seems so contradictory to this desire for independence.

Choosing to be here in the US, I struggle to represent the truths I experience despite this. In the United States the way in which the cultures relate has been poisoned by the specter of racism.  The complex way in which racism was born, named and now has insidiously changed itself into a thing which can exist despite the stated collective desires for freedom, peace and equality is a direct function of the way this country has been created.  It is something for which everyone who lives here is responsible.

In conclusion, I care about where you are from … but how we behave now that we are all here is what concerns me most.

M.T. Karthik, Harlem, August 10, 1997
[did not appear in the New Yorker magazine]

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M.T. Karthik

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This blog archives early work of M.T. Karthik, who took every photograph and shot all the video here unless otherwise credited.

Performances and installations are posted by date of execution.

Writing appears in whatever form it was originally or, as in the case of poems or journal entries, retyped faithfully from print.

all of it is © M.T. Karthik

a minute of rain

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