Decades of my mid-life were swallowed by the great American fiction. I could do nothing meaningful in it. The best I could hope for was working for the least compromised insiders I could find.

I gave what I had: my voice, my words, some small amount of muscle and legwork.

Mostly I supported other Americans. My name’s not on much of it. Yet evidence of our efforts exist as more than memory, despite the way the USA has changed. “Vast contributions never disclosed.”

Everything I write, say and do is governed by an oath I took when I was 14, a minor, instructed to do so by my mother, who sought to divorce my father. This was how I became an American, twelve years after my parents brought me here from India when I was two.

To this moment, I have felt utterly manipulated by indoctrination through the socio-political behavior of every American educational institution I attended, and every American I ever met, befriended or loved.

I cordoned off sections of who I am and behaved as asked by Americans to go to school, to have relationships. To find work. To find places to live. To participate in a society that considers me separate and apart from it, at best – and at worst, a terrorist.

And they have always treated me as if I demand correcting.

Americans have spent four decades telling me how and what to think. Some of it is useful. But my thoughts and beliefs have always been separate and distinct from the vast majority of theirs. I know all men are not created equal.

They condescend to me and treat me “less than” as an immigrant, first and most. It has always felt as if I am just being allowed to exist, and merely tolerated. Being told what they will call me. Being told how to be.

I tell people I am a pet in a zoo. Or that my life was like a Truman Show before the movie ever came out or the book was ever written.

I have been an American for 46 years and the entirety of US American society is oppressive to me. Or racist against me, my name and culture. Or isolating.

The lies are believed so broadly by coalitions of pseudo-social entities: religions, corporations and the military, that defining what an American is or isn’t is in my face all the fucking time. Fuck you.

I am totally alone because you isolate me for being a free thinker. You isolate me for not going on the ride of your pop culture or sportstainment. “It’s how we talk American.”

It’s how we begrudgingly let Guantanamo happen or a 20-year failed, illegal war in Afghanistan and Iraq, or Iran, now. Were any of these any less illegal than Russia in the Ukraine?

Decades of lies and obfuscation in the wake of the terrorist attacks of 2001 – a military intelligence failure that remains insufficiently explained – has created legions of disinformed loyalists to absurd fictions and positions of state. Democrats and Republicans, deluded both … programmed.

So much 100% bullshit spouted by indoctrinated ignoramuses all around me on the 250th birthday of the USA.

sad. sickening. disgusting.

STFU and LEAVE ME ALONE, MONOGLOT!